“The trouble is that, for women, being “nice” often translates into putting up with things we should never put up with. How many times has some creep sat uncomfortably close to me on the bus and stared me down, yet I’m too afraid to just get up and move, lest I offend him?
We smile when we’re harassed on the street or hit on by jerks. We laugh at sexist jokes. We learn that when we have strong opinions, we’ll be called bitches and that if we get angry, we’ll be called hysterical. When we say what we want, we’re called pushy or aggressive.
Part of learning “ladylike” behavior is about learning to smile politely when someone is being crude. Femininity has long been attached to passivity and to being docile. Men fight, women giggle and fume silently.”
– Women And Girls Don’t Need To Be Told To Be Nicer, Meghan Murphy for xoJane
Hey my lovelies,
So when I spotted this quote on Artparasites on Facebook, it hit a chord. I could totally relate to the first paragraph, having been in the same position of not wanting to move on a bus for fear of judgement. We are in the 21st century, why on earth does society still have such a hold on our behaviour?! It saddens me that I don’t have to courage to just be myself and not give a shit of what society thinks of me! And I know I’m far from the only one who suffers from feeling pressured into society dictated gender roles/behaviour, and I am not just talking women here but men too. It is something I want to work on, learning to ignore opinions of people I don’t even know, and flourishing within myself instead! One of my sincerest wishes would be for societal pressures to not exist, but sadly the Miller Effect (watch the movie We’re the Millers) will not fade out of fashion; I think it is part of our human nature to compare and want to fit in, survival of the fittest and all. It’s not just about possessions but behaviour and roles in society too. Anyway it’s some food for thought! I’d love to hear your opinions on the subject!
Love Carina xo